Obviously I hate False Sexpectations... You didn't notice?
So it should come as no shock that there are few words in the English language I hate more than "Tomorrow Night..." These are the words my beautiful wife says with promising eyes as she turns me down. Not just turns me down, but turns me down after giving me the signs all day!
Women, you need to understand something... When you give the sexpecation that sex will happen in the next 12 hours, the launch sequence is initialized! You cannot just power down all thrusters at a moments notice. You might have not given a second thought to sex the entire rest of the day but we have been thinking about it non-stop every 60 seconds (or more frequently) the entire day!!!!! (Breathe....)
So ... THE NEXT NIGHT WHEN YOU TELL ME YET AGAIN "TOMORROW NIGHT!" and I believe you.... SHAME ON ME FOR BELIEVING YOU! And when we get to tomorrow night and you tell me "I'm sorry I'm just not in the mood tonight, I should feel into it tomorrow night and it will be much better sex! Do you hate me??"
Do I hate you???? The women I have chosen to spend my life with, through thick and thin, rich and pour, and some other stuff... To love, honor and such... To spend the rest of my life making love to you and only you... as you tow me along by the junk because you have all the power and know it...
Do I hate you, my love, my all?
You don't even need to ask.
I hate you... so very, very much. I do. Absolutely. For at least 24 more hours.
P.S. It is disturbing (and hot) to me that if you do a google images search for "Slave" 50% of the pictures are Princess Leia in the gold bikini...
Fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice and I'm going to sneak attack your ass in your sleep. Literally.
ReplyDeleteJust point at her and say "Look woman! Get naked!" that never works for me, every time!
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